When the dog bites . . .

Today I stray from Meaty Ave. and head down Dalliance Ln. Won’t you join me, please?

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Agreeably Disagreeable

You all recognize this precious little angel, right?

She is most famously remembered for this quote, in which she shrieks at the top of her lungs:


And if you didn’t give it to her . . . oooo, boy, did you have it coming.

And really, can we blame sweet, dear Veruca Salt? Transported into the magical kingdom of Wonka Land, bedazzled and blown away by the sights, sounds, tastes, and smells, well . . . I can’t imagine I would be in much control of my wants. And truly, my own candy dish — does it still count as a “dish” if it’s an entire drawer? — has been known to send me into a saccharine induced tizzy. Maybe a sugar-high is to blame for Ms. Salt’s lack of decorum and self-restraint.

Or, perhaps not.

In my 29 and 9/10 years on earth, I have never experienced anything more difficult than . . . wait for it . . . it’s coming . . . a few more seconds . . . any minute now . . .

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